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Friday, October 1, 2010

How is a seizure like being adopted?

Many of you know that on August the 7th I crashed out of bed with a seizure.  The good news is the MRI was fine, but I am still awaiting the EEG for final results.  In this post I want to mention how this experience has given me a tiny glimpse of my children and what it is like to be adopted, yet by no means do I wished to fully equate this seizer with being adopted.   I do believe this situation will help me understand my girls and other adopted children better.

First, my life changed immediately out of no fault of my own.  I did nothing physically or mentally to cause the seizure and there was nothing I could have done to prevent it  Likewise there is nothing the adopted child has done to physically or mentally cause their situation and there really is little they could have done to prevent it..

Second, I recall kicking and screaming for them to let me go as they grabbed me and put me on the stretcher.  My wife also said I screamed that I did not want to die.  I am certain that even when adopted children   might be living in undesirable places many kick and scream when they are forced out of their situations.  Like me, they often have little understanding what is really happening and that others have their best interest at heart and are truly trying to help them.

Third, I personally feel limited and very different right now.  For example I cannot drive a car for six months.  Many understand this and wish to assist me, yet, there is still this highly awkward feeling being different than other people.  Likewise, my children and other adopted children feel different because they have different biological parents and may have different skin colors.  I think we need to truly acknowledge and understand this feeling of awkwardness and let them experience it and express it.

Finally, I am very grateful when I had my seizer there were loved ones there who contacted medical help which led me to getting the proper medial treatment.  I am assuming the EEG will be fine, there will be a good diagnosis, and I will drive in six months.  Then, this will be a memory.  Yet, I hope to never truly forget this experience and how it can help me understand my girls and all adopted children so much better.

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